First of all I REALLY want to apologize for taking such a long sabbatical since the Second Round of the Graceful Agony Blog Carnival went live… It has been for a few reasons, and I am very sorry. I hope y’all forgive me! I have been working through a great deal in my head as of late, and I just completely lost my muse, hit the wall, suffered from a nasty case of writers block… Thank you to EVERYONE who checked up on me… I appreciate all of you so very much, and I am grateful to have wonderful friends in this community….
Well that is a good segue into my Thanksgiving post isn’t it? Gratitude…. This weekend (in Canada) is a time for stopping to reflect on the previous year, and to be thankful….. NOW, no eye-ball rolling or sighs allowed here…. for a lot of you reading, YOU have had to deal with pain and illness every day for the past year, years, some decades even. I know how hard it is to stop and be grateful for ANYTHING let alone to celebrate and have a party! Oh, trust me, I know how that feels…. If today was Christmas you would be saying ‘BAH HUMBUG and calling me Scrooge today. I am NOT in a very thankful mood….
I have been in a 3 1/2 month flare, my nerve pain is more intense than it usually is, I walked out of my last Doctor’s appointment not EVER wanting to go back, I am feeling isolated as of late (oh the joys of this illness), and rather poopy all around…. and that is BEFORE I even get to the migraine that has ensued this past week…. Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!! Um… can you say sarcasm? Me too…..
But that is not how I want to go into the holiday weekend…. I want to be able to enjoy this weekend, and spend good time with my family, enjoy a nice meal, and blow the dust of this closed off heart I have been carrying around as of late and try to figure out how I am going to change my perspective a little…..
I am trying to find room for gratitude…..
So let’s start at the beginning… the basics…. I am um, er, thankful for my unhealth. No, I mean it – I honestly do. I NEED to be thankful for my health because if I think I have it bad, all I have to do is take a look around… with open eyes… and then I realize that my illnesses are chronic, not terminal. I might wake up with horrible pain every single day… but the fact is, I wake up. And with each day comes an opportunity for change.
I am also thankful for my family…. oh lordy am I ever grateful for my family…. Maybe THAT should have been the first on my list. I have a gorgeous son who loves me like no other…. I have my supportive and honorable man…. I have BOTH my Mom and Dad, and they are not just my parents, but my best friends… I have my sister, my niece, my furry babies…. I am blessed…
I also have my Graceful Agony family… that is one blessing that I didn’t have last year! Can you believe that I started this blog just this past January? I have only been at this for 10 months!! I also have my family over on our facebook support group… 200 PEOPLE TO BE EXACT!!! And I feel like I have made some life-long relationships here. You all keep me going through rough spells…. You encourage and support me each and every day… You cry with me, share my load when it gets too heavy to carry on my own… YOU are more than just my friends, I consider you all my family as well. I am forever grateful…
Sure, there are a lot of things I am NOT grateful for at the moment, I am not going to lie. But as I write this I am finding more and more room for gratitude…
I have a roof over my head,
Food on my table,
Love in my heart,
a scooter to ride ;-)
I have had the ability to enter your lives,
and you have not only come into mine,
but you have changed me… and I am grateful….
So for today, I am purposefully making room for all those blessings in my life… and I hope you will too…
What are you making room for today?
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